Not dead yet . . .

. . .yet again!!
I had geared myself up for bad news from the consultant for her to say, "No change" again. We spent more time talking about holidays than we did anything else. Back in December, so huge sighs of relief all round and another 4 months repreive!!

Beyond that I seem to be in a bit of a trough at the moment. I found the very hot weather particularly trying, and the whole thing culminated in me feeling decidedly unwell this past week. Much better now - I am even eating again, which is a bit annoying coz I could well do with a few months of starvation!

Last weekend was the christening of my friend Beverley's twins, Hannah and Matthew. The babies were beautiful and Lynn and I were both astounded at how much of the service we knew by heart - and that lightning didn't strike either of us! As ever, Bev's Mum was never knowingly undercatered and we had a great day.

Miss Phoebe came to play again this week. As a result of her stage appearance in London she was asked to audition for "The Sound of Music". You know, the production they are looking for a Maria for on the tele!! As it happens she can't do it, as she will be on stage in "Annie" the week they start rehearsals, but they will need more children later, so her name is on the list for next year. Amanda seems to think it would be for Brigitta, the ten-year-old, given how tall Phoebe is. Watch this space. . .

Cat seems to have come through his operation very well. He has NOT got cancer, but will need some steroid treatment later to help him out. Meanwhile he is being spoiled rotten with chicken dinners and will probably never eat cat-food again!! He has already put on some weight!

Gearing up this week for the Great-Aunt's Birthday Picnic next Saturday. I have this great feeling of foreboding coz no-one is talking to me about it, so I am sure they are not going to turn up. Mind you I'm always like this, so I should STOP WORRYING HA flippin' HA HA!!

There's a cybercrop on UKS this weekend, and though I'm not actually doing it I have been looking at the "BOOK OF ME" prompts. I asked Alan if he could list five things which would indicate that it was ME in the house, rather than anyone else. His list reads

• Television on and no-one watching
• Handbag at the bottom of the stairs
• Someone talking on the phone
• Coke bottle and glass out
• Books everywhere

How well he knows me. Four out of five were the same as mine, the only difference being I left out the phone and left my shoes in the hall!!

That WAS a week, that was!!

I can't think where the time goes!

Lots has happened. We spent a couple of days helping Beth do up the bathroom in her house. It had a very yukky old carpeted floor and brown plastic accessories, so it now looks a lot better with chrome bits and a vinyl floor - MUCH better for small boys!

Said small boy was abducted and taken over to the Isle of Wight by his uncle and aunt. He has come back very brown and slightly bruised where he fell out of a tree, but he had a wonderful time, most of it spent on the beach. Nick and Dena spent the rest of the week restoring their energy levels!! They spent last Saturday night here, and we went out on the Saturday evening for Nick's birthday. Can I have a son who is now 36?? Apparently I can!

The previous Saturday was Phoebe's end of year presentation at her ballet school so I went with Amanda to watch. I admire Yasmin, who owns the school. She gets every child up on stage, no matter their ability, and they all give their very best. Some of the older girls are very good. It is so strange seeing the contrast between the on-stage poised young dancer, and the off-stage kid having a laugh with her mates.

Phoebe is here overnight as it is my turn to child-mind tomorrow. She is shattered as she has been up since 6am. She was lucky enough to be one of 100 children to participate in a workshop on Saturday to chose 25 to perform at the launch of London Theatre Kids Week. Phoebe was good enough to be one of the 25, so she had to be in London at 9.30 this morning to rehearse, later performing on the stage of the Prince of Wales theatre in the West End with the cast of "Mamma Mia" The launch was broadcast on TV in London, but of course, none of us will ever see it!!

I spent Sunday at a crop in Berkshire. Yes, it is a bit of a long way to go, but it is run by my UKS team leader, MJ, and most of my fellow Scrapettes were there. Anyway, it's not half as far as it is for the lovely Linda, who took me there and back. It takes her an hour to get to me, and another hour to the crop, bless her. I had a fab day, and I actually did a whole layout, which is unheard of for me, coz I am usually too busy gassing.

What else? Oh yes, the cat has had to go to the vet. He has a growth in his stomach which has to be removed. Bit scary as he is 17, which makes him around 82 in cat years. The vet seems sure he can sort him out. Apparently all his blood tests came back showing him to be in remarkable shape for a mog his age. Anyone care to guess how much he is going to cost us THIS time? His sister has also turned up. She has been missing for about six weeks and we had really given her up for lost. She is totally deaf, and totally daft, so we thought a car might have hit her, but there she was, scruffy, grubby, and hungry. She ate everything in sight and disappeared again. She IS a floozie, so she probably has several other homes.

I also had a visit from a friend who now lives in the States. She has been gone 12 years and is one of the few people who never forgets my second daughter. We have exchanged cards and letters over the years and it was really great to see her. She did admit to finding the heat oppressive - and she comes from California!!

So there we are. A week and a bit in the life of someone who never does anything. . .!!

Whale watching in suburbia

Had my scan yesterday, so today I am sitting here feeling sorry for myself coz I am left with post-scan queasiness. Lasts about two days, and then I'm back to normal - or what passes for normal round here. They have a new scanner. (Just as well really, as the old one is broken!) They are very protective of their new scanner, and don't want to break it, so how much do I weigh?? Now, I don't know. I don't weigh myself on principle, because I think it is far too depressing. I was right! It is depressing. They weighed me. Since August 2004 when I had the nephrectomy I have GAINED over six stone. Now how is that possible? I have cancer, for heavens sake. ADVANCED METASTATIC cancer!! Possibly, no PROBABLY, incurable cancer. Now I KNOW I am a bit of a fraud, because, despite the scary diagnosis, and the VERY scary prognosis, I actually feel fine. HONESTLY. I have had no symptoms of this disease, so it is very easy to ignore it and just get on with life. There really isn't anything brave or praiseworthy about it, coz I really can just push it out of my mind, and it doesn't jump up and bite me on the bum. However, I DO NOT expect to GAIN WEIGHT!!!! There is no jolly justice is there?

I also have my own personal soap-box about the way obesity is being treated. It's an epidemic, we're told. It's a serious problem. And yet, if you ask a health professional for help you get virtually nothing. Because it's your own fault. If you weren't weak-willed and lazy and stuffing your face 24/7 you'd be slim and energetic. OH YEAH! My contention is that eating disorders should be given the same level of funding as alcoholism and drug addiction. I also believe there is ONE fundamental difference between food addicts and other addiction. Hard as it may be, anyone addicted to one substance, or one set of substances, can chose NEVER to use them again. Food addicts still have to eat. EVERY DAY. More than once. What do you imagine the recovery rate for alcoholism would be if every alcoholic in recovery were forced to have one drink a day? Just one, no more, no less. Oh, and to add insult to injury, that drink must be your LEAST FAVOURITE form of alcohol. That's what food addicts have to do. Every day. You HAVE to eat. You HAVE to eat stuff you don't like much. EVERY DAY! FOREVER!! And they wonder why it doesn't work!!

And why, if I really want to buck the odds, and try to lose weight, do I have to PAY to go to Weight Watchers or Slimming World? Why does my local Health Centre (5 practices under one roof) not have an obesity clinic? Can you imagine the outcry if there were organisations preying on alcoholics and drug abusers and turning their rehabilitation into a multi-million dollar "industry"? Yet we fatties are EXPECTED to become part of that exploitation. GRRRRR!

And Jan falls through the top of her soap-box, crushing it to matchwood

TAGGED!

by MJ

1. How old are you? 59
2. How many kids do you have if any? 4 originally, 3 now plus two grandchildren.
3. Are you married, single, divorced, widow,? Married to second husband, but first love! (aaaaah)
4. What is your occupation? Retired
5. What are your passions? Family, Books, Internet, Scrapping
6. Are you a dreamer or a dream seeker? Dreamer - too lazy to be an dream seeker
7. Are you happy with the way you life has turned out? NO! I am NEVER satisfied with my life, but that is because I am never satisfied with MYSELF
8. Are you a scrapper and if so how many hours a week do you scrap? Yes, but not enough, given that I have no job. Easily distracted by almost anything
9. What do you want to do before you die? LIVE!! I was told I had only 18 months nearly two years ago, so I am just taking each day as it comes!
10. What is your favorite food? Sushi - Chocolate isn't food. It's more important than that!
11. What is the food you hate the most? Tomatoes and olives
12. What is the most embarrassing thing that has ever happened to you? Telling my dick-head ex-husband off at our son's wedding - and then catching his wife's eye. I had to apologise to her. Bless her, she agreed with me. She is FAR too good for him.
13. What is the happiest day of your life thus far? Marrying Alan. Second time around for both of us. It was my parents' Golden Wedding Anniversary, and my eldest daughter came back from a year in Costa Rica specially the day before.
14. Are you a neat freak? FAR from it! My father once described my house as "Comfortably scruffy" It must have been DIRE for him to notice!
15. What is the worst thing you have ever done? Left my daughter in hospital overnight when she was ill because I knew there was a chance she would have a heart attack during the night and I couldn't face it. She DIDN'T know, and wanted me to stay with her. 16 years on I still feel bad about it. - Oh, and when I was three I filled my little brother's mouth with stones to stop him crying.

So tell me why I have been TOTALLY HONEST here? And I'm going to put this online so the whole world can see it. . . BLOGGERS ARE NUTS!

Just a few doodles. . .

Doodling has become something of an obsession in the World of Scrap recently. Kirsty Wiseman issued a challenge to us to scrap ourselves, with doodles! The response was overwhelming, and the doodling was FAB. Since then it has got everywhere. Advertisements, clothes, magazines. have a look and you'll see the "flowers and doodles" theme wherever you go. I did this page for Kirsty's challenge. Bit of a cheat really, as the centres of the flowers LOOK hand-drawn, but are actually cut out of black and white patterned paper.



Recently Elsie Flanigan posted a full page of doodles she did on a recent flight, my DD (Dear Daughter) Beth pinched Elsie's idea and ran with it. Now I've had a play. This is MUCH more structured that the "done in 2 hours" one on Elsie's blog, but I had such fun with it. Anyone spot my trademark Nelliephant??

Oh, and it is a VERY late submission for the WISH dare on "Everyone is Speshal" an inspirational site with some of the UK's bestest talent on it

On another note I have FINALLY got an appointment date for my next CT scan. Until now the paperwork has always arrived almost as soon as I have had the previous consultant's appointment - except for the occasion when they made the booking, but didn't tell me when it was. The psychic school of healthcare! Anyway, no paperwork this time, so I rang them, only to be told they'd let me know "nearer the time" Given that they need 10-14 days to process the results 3rd August is getting quite near. Panic over, I go NEXT Thursday. My stomach is already churning at the thought. The scan itself isn't a problem. The machine is like a giant sqare Polo mint with a hole in the middle and the couch goes back and forward through the hole. The middle bit looks and sounds a bit like a huge washing machine, revolving around you. It isn't claustrophobic, and it isn't hot (only because the COMPUTERS have to be kept cool, the sick people can freeze to death!!) I don't even have any problem with the iodine injection they give you, though I know some people get a hot flush. It's the BARIUM!! Oh YUK. I get a litre of this white gloppy stuff an hour before the scan and I have to sip it slowly over the hour. It is usually cold, white, tasteless and JUST AWFUL. Every time I think "It won't be THAT bad" I take ONE sip and it is. It makes me feel so queasy I get anxious about lying in the machine. Last time i was there the lady next to me got a half-litre to drink. I just said "I'm sicker than you, then!" Stuff can also have a very unfortunate effect on the internal workings (or NOT workings) of Jan, but I'm not sure you want to know that.

AnywaY, I'll get the results at the beginning of August. Last lot threw me a bit, because we had got used to the "stable - no change" verdict and the "a bit worse, but we can't tell how fast it's getting worse til the NEXT scan" was a bit scary. This IS the next scan, so we will find out how fast things are deteriorating. I still don't have any appreciable symptoms, so I'm not writing my will yet. . .

That was the week. . .

. . .that was! Where did it go, I ask myself. Obviously a sign of old age, specially as I now can't remember anything we did!

Dom came to stay on Saturday so that his Mum could go to a crop in Gosport. Dom spent as much time as he could with Ben from next door and I ended up with two small boys hiding behind cushions on my sofa watching Dr Who. Shoved Dom in the bath and left him to play for a few minutes. He called me into the bathroom and this is what I found:-

Bless his heart - he said he wants to be a grandpa. I think it may be because Grandpa has a train set to play with - Oh, sorry, model railway!!

Sunday we went on a family picnic, organised by Amanda's MIL. Linda is a dynamic force, and England game notwithstanding, all the blokes turned up!! The kids had a whale of a time. At one stage they disappeared into the woods to build a den (with adult help) and were gone for an hour and a half. We shall be going back to Manor Farm in August for my Aunt Rosemary's 80th birthday picnic. I didn't take many photos. This one shows the three kids across the other side of the clearing from where we were picnicking, and gives some idea of the space they have to run riot in!!

Monday night was our monthly crop at Waterlooville. It's nice to sit and chat and scrap, and for once I actually got something done. I finished a CJ entry for the Feline Groovy CJ I am doing. Posting day was yesterday, so I was in plenty of time. WHY is it still not mailed, you ask? Well, that would be the agoraphobia kicking in again. I can go out WITH other people. I was FINE on Sunday in the wide open spaces of the Country park, but ask me to walk to the post-box on my own and I turn to jelly - and those of you who have met me will know that that is a LOT of jelly. Tomorrow I have a commitment to go out, so I will manage that. It's only promises to myself I can't keep.

Another CJ arrived on Tuesday morning and I just did the entry straight off. This is SO not me - Mrs Procrastination-with-bells-on. It is due out tomorrow, so that one will be back on track. I'm pleased with it, but I did know EXACTLY what I was going to do before it turned up, and that doesn't happen often!

There's been yet another victim in the scrapshop massacre that seems to be taking place at the moment. Long-established "bricks and mortar" shops are dropping by the wayside as the pressure from the small online-only operators, and the increasing use of UK distributors by the big American maufacturers, squeezes them from both directions. Cotswold Keepsakes will be greatly missed by many of us.

Now, you see, I've wasted another half-hour of what was SUPPOSED to be crafting time. Mrs Procrastination strikes again. . .

Waiting for. . .

Well, I'm not sure what. I feel as though I'm living in a Beckett play, specifically "Waiting for Godot" where the main theme is that nothing happens!

It hasn't been an eventful week, but a few interesting things have happened. I posted two reviews on the "Information Britain" website. Interesting that the positive review of the restaurant has appeared, and the negative one of the B&B has not. nor have I had any response to my e-mail asking why it has been binned.

I'm also waiting for a response to an e-mail from an Altered Art forum. I joined ages ago, but I can't access it now, even with the new password they sent me, and Beth tells me my name is no longer on the membership list. The site won't let me re-join, even with another username, so I am in limbo, and I have no idea why! I think I have now e-mailed them four or five times, but no response. Very odd! I know several people who are members of this forum, but I don't really want to involve them.

My crafting is taking a bit of a back seat at the moment. Just don't have the inspiration. Probably because the stash is in such a muddle. So this week I shall concentrate on having a mega sort-out and maybe NEXT week the creative bug will bite again. Phoebe came to stay overnight and made some ATCs*. I wanted to scan them, but she wanted to take them home with her, so here are some of mine instead!

Dom is very into drawing and painting at present. Some time ago he drew me this FABBY picture. I can't remember whether it is a crocodile or a dinosaur, but I think it looks very aboriginal and I intend to frame it for my craft room

Apparently it's a
magic fish!

by
Dominic

* ATC stands for Artist's Trading Card. Originally designed to showcase an artist's work, these little (3.5 x 2.5ins) cards have become a craze in the papercraft world. They cannot be sold, but only traded one for one with other makers. It's fun to collect little bits or original artwork from all over the world. Anyone want to trade??

Dire Warning!!

Went away for the weekend to celebrate the joint Gemini birthdays of myself and my mate, Lynn. We decided to go to Rye in East Sussex as we are both Mapp and Lucia aficionados and fancied swanning around town with our shopping baskets. Very busy place, Rye, and we had a bit of trouble finding anywhere to stay. In the end Lynn found Simmons of the Mint, which was our big mistake. It LOOKED fine, Four stars/diamonds from the RAC and the tourist board.

There was no indication online that the owners do not live on site. In fact there is no-one on site, and the emergency number we were given went straight to voicemail. We needed to telephone them, because, for some reason, they were running their central heating! We didin't notice this until we came back from dinner at about 10.30pm and the heat inside hit us in the face. Normally one would just turn the radiators off. Normally one would have the knobs on the radiators to allow them to be turned off. Not so!! It got to the pitch that we were going to pack up and find somewhere else to stay when they finally switched off at 11.30pm. On again at 6am though!

It cooled down a bit, but we did have our window wide open. Mistake number two. The MInt. Noisy, rowdy chav pub with yelling, screaming and breaking glass until about 1.30 am. That was Friday night. Saturday late afternoon there was a full-scale brawl in the road with one bloke having his face pushed through the window of a shop just up the road. When we went out to dinner there was blood all over the place. When we came back it was broken glass in our doorway and lads having piggy-back fights outside the pub. Bear in mind the road is only about 10 feet wide and all this sounds as though it is in bed with us!!

Bed and breakfast we paid for. The bedlinen didn't fit, and I had to re-make our bed coz when I turned back the covers it looked as though someone had already slept in it. (It did smell OK!). The tea-tray wasn't good enough - no sugar, not enough milk. No water glasses provided. no towel=rail for damp towels. TV remote didn't work. Bear in mind we are talking FOUR STAR here!! No ensuite, and the shower-room door had recently been replaced, but not painted!

Breakfast was supposed to be served at 9am. We arrived downstairs at 9.05, just as a rather grubby and dishevelled waitress arrived at work. The tables had not been laid. Fresh fruit; tho' the pineapple was on the way out. One small packet of corn-flakes (which was left open on the side from Saturday breakfast to Sunday). One empty jar of marmalade, which was grudgingly refilled, one nearly empty and rather sticky bottle of ketchup. One jug of orange juice. Cutlery in a tray on the floor. Cooked breakfast was as advertised, but arrived at 9.45 Toast flat on a plate and stone cold.

We asked the girl who cooked the breakfast what we could do about the heating. She told us the owners were away for the weekend, and she didn't know what to do. In the end her partner just unplugged the pump, which stopped the radiators getting hot. We know that the owners were made aware of our problems. but they just didn't give a toss. Happy to take our money though. So, be warned Simmons of the Mint, Rye, East Sussex. Don't go there!!

If you DO go to Rye you should definitely go to The Fish Cafe in Tower Street and to Hayden's Coffee Shop in the High Street. Hayden's does accommodation, too!!

Next year I may stay home!

Moving too fast. . .

The world is moving too fast for me at the moment. My favourite craft shop, Canny Craft, has closed. This has wide-reaching impact as Canny (Anne and James) were the sole sponsors of the PapaercraftsUK Forum, which was my intro to this whole online community thingy. PCUK has been my online home for a couple of years. Beth found it first, and joined, and then I tried, but it just wouldn't let us have two logins from the same IP address. For some months we shared the log-in as Panicmum and PanicGran, with Beth posting in blue and me posting in red.

An update of the forum allowed me my own identity and we have been part of the furniture there ever since. Last January Canny organised a Retreat and many of us travelled to Cwmbran for a weekend of crafting and chatting and laughter and fun. Losing Anne and James is like losing part of the fabric of our lives. Luckily the Forum is to continue, and those of us who need a daily, if not hourly, fix will still be able to get it.

I think it is a particular function of online communties where women are in the majority that the overt purpose of the Forum - a shared interest in papercrafts - has almost become secondary to the support network we form for each other. PCUK seems to function as an extended family for many of its members, and we would all be devastated at its demise. Hooray, then, for "Techy James" who has rescued it from oblivion.

The Glums?

I was taken to see a local drama group presentation of "Les Miserables" last night. I have seen the London production twice, so I was not expecting a great deal, but I have to say these kids were PHENOMENAL!! There were certainly some excellent voices amongst them and the maturity of performance made it very difficult to believe that they were all under 18. Apart from young Gavroche, that is! Phoebe's cousin Declan in his first speaking/singing role. He is so tiny; he is only weeks younger than Phoebe, but just about comes up to her shoulder. This will be such an asset to him as a child performer as he will always be able to "act down".

Spent a day with Phoebe and Dom on Friday. We ventured down to Gunwharf, where the Volvo Ocean Race was preparing to leave. It was less manic that I had anticipated - we even got a seat in a restaurant without waiting! Took the kids to see Ice Age 2 - coz Dom and I both LOVE Manfred the Mammoth. Lovely to see him with a girl-friend, even if she is ditsy as hell and thinks she's a possum. My kinda mammoth!

Plate smashing optional

This week, being half-term, my grand-daughter is involved in another dance festival. She is 8 now and has been dancing since she could walk. She just LOVES to dance. Today was the classical Greek section. Alan asked if we needed to provide plates for smashing, but it isn't THAT kind of greek dancing! She was just beautiful. It was her first attempt at the Greek style and she did it very well.

She made me cry, which is a bit unusual, but she was SO lovely, and I feel SO cross that I'm probably not going to see her grow up. Now I've said that, fate will intervene again and make me a liar, but I jolly don't care as long as I can stick around for another 10 years or so.

She has already done her Tap section, which she won, but has Modern, Ballet, Song and Dance and Character to go. I don't know about you, but it exhausts me just THINKING about it! I admire my daughter for her committment to this child. Every dance has its own costume and hairstyle, not to mention the make-up! (she's got more than me) and Amanda has a full-time job. She is mad, of course, but in a completely different way from me! Lucky ONE of us has some energy.

Art and crafts

Spent yesterday at a crop organised by Katie and Dave from Cre8tive Online. Good fun, good food and good chat, as always. I love listening to Katie and Dave talking to each other whilst they work. They are really funny, but I'm not sure they realise it! Dave is in charge of the shop whilst Katie teaches, and then he dashes off to collect lunch and does a mean pudding! It was good to see people and have a gossip as well as ACTUALLY COMPLETING a layout, which may be a first for me at a crop.

Today I went to help out at our local Art Show. I really only had to collect door money and talk a lot, so that was no hardship. We have a Manor House in our village which was threatened with demolition some years ago. It was bought by a couple of local people who run it as a residential home, and have formed a Trust to care for it. Since then the Trust has bought two other properties and the annual Art Show is part of their fund-raising calendar. I try to buy a picture every year, which hasn't always been easy, but this year there was an exceptionally high standard and I had a hard job chosing. Mind you there were a LOT of pictures of boats!!

I was buttonholed by the Rector, who thought he ought to know who I was. He does now! I find it quite difficult to avoid answering people who ask how I am without telling them!! Given that I have virtually no symptoms, it's a bit hard to say "Still dying" I feel a complete fraud, and yet I KNOW that I am really lucky to be alive. It's so difficult to know what to tell people when I don't really know what is going on myself. Anyway, I'll save the "Living with cancer not dying of cancer" monologue for a day when nothing else has happened! Bet you're all gagging for that one!

Rivetting stuff

Gosh, it's been a wild couple of days - not! Yesterday I spent with Beth. we have this deal whereby we do each other's housework. Don't ask me why cleaning her bathroom is more interesting than cleaning mine, it just IS, right?
Today was "lunch in the pub with the girlies" day. Great lasagne! One of said girlies, my best mate was having a birthday so she got the odd pressy. I say ODD advisedly. A money-box to save up for new shoes and a fairy dress-up doll - and the obligatory VERY rude card. She claims to be 50 this year. I invite you to disbelieve this. We reckon the picture in the attic must look pretty duff by now.

This photo was taken last year at her wedding, but she hasn't aged in 12 months!! I am working on a clippykits handbag for her birthday, which isn't actually until Monday, thank God. Mind you I haven't finished the wedding album yet. . .

Spent the afternoon with my aunt. She's number four of five sisters, my mother was number two. She has just lent me her photo albums so I have scanned everything in sight. Pictures of my mother at two and of ME at the Coronation. Told you I was old! Many layouts now in my head!

Off to a crop tomorrow. I WILL get a layout done - maybe. I talk too much and scrap too slowly.

So why Subversive Elephant?

Soon after I started University (at the advanced age of 37) my VERY conventional ex-husband chose to tell me I had turned from a "normal mother" into a "radical Marxist Feminist". I've never been altogether sure he knew the meaning of any of those terms - and I've never been a Marxist! I was telling my mother this story and I declared forcefully, "I'm sure he thinks I'm a subversive elephant!" Given that I am a lady of "traditional build" it seemed appropriate to adopt the malapropism and make it my own. Some 20 years on I am still subverting as much as possible - and I am still VERY fond of elephants.

In the beginning . . .

. . . there' s me. Minding my own business, doing my own thing. Then blogs arrive. Do I get one? Nah! Who wants to know what I think? Do I even KNOW what I think? Umm - well I'm thinking about that! And while I'm thinking I'm reading other blogs, and finding them fascinating, and helpful, and funny and sad. Bit like my life really.
So here I am. Not dead yet! I guess sharing my life might be cathartic. I'm game to give it a go!